Unearthing the authentic self

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Hey everyone,

Wow, it has been a long time since I have posted a blog, and it feels wonderful to reconnect with you all in this beautiful way again.  I hope to be able to make time in the months ahead to share more blog posts and material on my YouTube channel but it's good enough to be here right now and share a long overdue update and short expression piece with you all.

The last year has been an interesting, exciting and challenging time for me. Exploring, observing and setting down old ideas and versions of myself (or trying to!) has been an illuminating journey of self-discovery and remembrance.

Over the last 9 months, I have been deeply immersed in the process of unearthing my personal stories, patterns and behaviours. Having spent a total of 40 days of this year technology free, in social isolation and silence, has really helped me to acknowledge and appreciate the deeply entrenched conditioning we are exposed to as human beings and how these experiences and expectations can serve to alienate us from our true, authentic nature as individuals and from each other.

But what does it mean to be authentic, and how do we reconcile this desire in a world that places such heavy emphasis on conformity?

This piece is intended to share insight into what it means to be authentic and offer simple tips on how to tap into, and befriend, your true self.

One can conceptualise authenticity as a kind of individuality when someone aligns their actions with their values, beliefs, and personality, despite external pressures to conform.

Sounds straightforward enough, right?

When we think about ourselves in relation to the world, many of us would like to believe that we show up as we are, with a genuine realness, not necessarily bothered by what the next person thinks or feels about us.

Most often, the opposite is true.

In little ways, to some extent, we all seek approval, recognition, and affirmation from others and the outside world to help us feel like we belong. We may dress in a particular way or avoid sharing our unique perspective on a topic because it differs from the perspective of others.

The societal pressures to conform to expectations may mean that we begin to contort and shape ourselves ways that seek approval, thus masking our true self in the process.

We become what we assume other people want us to be, and while this could work for us temporarily, it can become frustrating, and sometimes painful, to keep some aspects of who we are hidden.

When we change who we are to fit in, it implies a belief that we are not enough and that who we are is not okay.

Fundamentally, rejection is what we fear the most. The real question we are asking ourselves is, "If I were to be myself, will I be accepted?"

The courage to accept ourselves

Embracing our authenticity requires us to rediscover our true selves. But that first means becoming aware of who the true self is, under the layers of indoctrination, conditioning, and self-criticism. 

It is an intentional process of unlearning outdated mental programs, which can be challenging at the best of times.

Self-acceptance is perhaps one of the most important tools toward unearthing our authentic expression as individuals.

When we embrace all of the parts of ourselves that wish to be acknowledged, even those ugly bits that we don’t like looking at, we may find that the validation that we once sought externally is something that we can now give to ourselves.

Learning to love and accept ourselves is a lifelong journey that requires courage, commitment, and consistency.

The more that we are able to interact with ourselves in a way that demonstrates care, compassion, and self-understanding, the more we will be able to express our unique qualities and values in the world and with others.

The call to be who we are

It takes bold strength to share ourselves openly, honestly, yet lovingly, and even more so when others do not seem to understand or accept us.

Giving ourselves permission to express and stand in our authentic truth, even in the face of ridicule or judgement, can be scary but also very liberating.

Rather than reject or suppress our true nature, we allow our inner self to radiate outward, granting ourselves the freedom to express who we are and encouraging others to follow suit.

When we put less effort into conformity and judgement, we can instead focus on enjoying life, being relatable, and genuine with those around us.

Tips toward embracing your authenticity

Despite the fact that authenticity is not in itself an innate trait, the good news is that there are practical ways in which you can embody the energy to support yourself and forge deep, meaningful connections with others.

1. Journaling and art therapy can be helpful tools to reflect on your thoughts and emotions, as well as learning more about how you see the world. It may also help become more at ease with expressing your feelings safely and creates awareness around the ways you may be censoring or limiting your self-expression.

   
   

2. Mindfulness, yoga, dance and other movement practices can be wonderfully supportive on the journey toward authenticity, not just for their ability to calm the mind and the senses but to help decode a wealth of information through the body.

   The body has an incredible way of sensing and perceiving our internal and external worlds, and it may reveal a great deal about your alignment, or lack thereof.

   Set aside time to focus on and care for your body. This mind/body reconnection will naturally encourage stronger mental, physical, and spiritual congruence.

3. Start slow; stay consistent.

   Don't feel compelled to be completely authentic right this instance; it's crucial that you feel supported and comfortable as you navigate towards radical self-expression.

   It will take time to figure out how to transform your relationships with yourself and the world in a sustainable way.

   On the journey toward authenticity, you may find yourself expressing vulnerability around others about your feelings or thoughts and discover that they do not respond or reciprocate in the way you would like. While this can sometimes feel unsettling or demotivating, remember that authenticity does not seek validation. Begin by finding people to whom you can relate comfortably, test the waters, observe, adjust, and try again.

   Growth lies outside of your comfort zone—the more you begin to practice the art of true expression, the easier it will become to navigate the journey and integrate this awareness into your life.

   
   
   
   

   Being true to ourselves should feel like the easiest thing to do. However, due to our early programming, media, and shaming experiences, expressing our true, authentic, self often feels like the most challenging task.

   We have all come to this earth plane to reveal our luminosity in a unique and beautiful way. To hide away from ourselves and the world serves no one.

   We must step into our power and believe we each have something valuable to share. Being true to ourselves is the only way to reach that truth.

   
   
   
   

   Authenticity is the compass that steers us in the direction of our ultimate fulfilment and joy.

   It requires us to embrace life with an open heart and trust that living in flow with our true essence will naturally magnetise us to the lives we seek and desire. So, I encourage you to always remain true to who you are and help pave the way for others to follow.

   The world yearns to experience your unique expression. There is only one you. Don’t be afraid to stand out and shine.

   
   

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About the author

Kirshnee Moodley is an energy intuitive, writer and passionate proponent of self- compassion, mindfulness and personal development.